Baby G on board – 4dpt

So I'm four days (well five, really) into this two-week wait. Which also isn't really two weeks. My pregnancy test is on Monday, September 10, which will be 12 days past my Aug 29 transfer. No idea why it's slightly shorter this time... Perhaps it has to do with the fact that this was a … Continue reading Baby G on board – 4dpt

Up, up and away

This script-to-screen of the opening sequence of Up found me by coincidence today. I clicked, of course. Now, let me just say that I have watched Up at least four times. I adored it every single time. It is a beautifully-executed animation that is sad, but also funny and hopeful. I was heartbroken for Carl … Continue reading Up, up and away

Inconceivable

Finally got around to reading Inconceivable: A Woman's Triumph over Despair and Statistics by Julia Indichova (it's also available for Kindle here), and it's one of the best captures of the rawness and desperation of infertility that I have read to date. It's been around since 1997, and I'm not sure how I've managed not … Continue reading Inconceivable

One way or another…

And for today's ever-hopeful, slightly deranged, will-I-ever-get-knocked-up tune, I present... https://open.spotify.com/track/5Th6EdNVhxp0TPX41ZLZk6?si=g7UmbMW6TL6MIiIkDWmsXg Made ya laugh, I hope 😉 T minus 7/8 days to lift off. CW.

On Pee(r) Pressure

If there is one thing that dominates conversations in every TTC (trying to conceive) and IVF chat group I have ever been in, it's pee. Did you POAS (pee on a stick - referring to a home pregnancy test)? Should I POAS? When are you POASing (yes, a verb too!)? Is it too early to … Continue reading On Pee(r) Pressure

On dark places

One of the biggest issues for women going through IVF (or at least the ones I know) is how isolating it all feels. You struggle with feeling like a failure as a woman and human being. You view the "you had one job" memes differently when you're can't fulfill your basic biological destiny. You're stuck … Continue reading On dark places

When words fail

A blogger friend sent love for our loss today. She had just miscarried too, she said. I felt a spanner in my gut tighten, my stomach lurching slightly. Fresh from another early loss, I knew her pain acutely. The gaping hole in my belly, and in my heart. I felt her hug from afar, a … Continue reading When words fail

Change in scenery

Quickly chiming in from the other end of the world after a crazy number of plane rides (blame summer prices) and way too much bad airplane food. We're in the motherland visiting the in-laws, and so begins a little time with family, nature, and some quiet from everyday life. Including... nah, perhaps especially... assisted baby-making … Continue reading Change in scenery

The Land of What Ifs and Buts

(Update below) It has been a 24-hour period of the highest high and one of the lowest lows I have ever experienced in a cycle. Sheer impatience, weird signs and a touch of nausea meant I caved yesterday (at 10dpt4dt) and peed on a stick. Opted for a Clearblue digital (expectation management since it requires … Continue reading The Land of What Ifs and Buts