It's not about trying to trust myself, it's about convincing myself that I should.
A Million Dreams: Because I needed a lift, and also because I found The Greatest Showman Reimagined album. This video of Pink recording the song (and the reprise) with her daughter also made my heart melt (and break a little). Incidentally, this song has been a part of pretty much every IVF playlist I have made … Continue reading A song for today
This quote popped up on a couple of my feeds and dragged me out of the hole I had been hiding in. It strikes close to the heart, especially as an unwilling resident of the Land of the Infertile. It is a noisy place, often filled with a cacophony of baseless assumptions, unsolicited advice and … Continue reading Choices
I started acupuncture again yesterday and didn't realise how much I needed it/would enjoy it. Those 40 minutes - when I put my phone on flight mode and listen to new age fertility meditation tunes (I'm usually asleep by track 3/4) - are a welcome respite from the chaos of my workday and, as importantly, … Continue reading Prickly realities
One of the biggest issues for women going through IVF (or at least the ones I know) is how isolating it all feels. You struggle with feeling like a failure as a woman and human being. You view the "you had one job" memes differently when you're can't fulfill your basic biological destiny. You're stuck … Continue reading On dark places
Sorry about the silence. I needed the technology detox and the plan was, in that quiet, to try and listen a little closer both to me and the world around me. Of course, I did none of that, but it was both liberating not to worry about charging my phone and empowering to categorically ignore … Continue reading The Big Thaw
“Whether a hawk, an eagle or a tiny hummingbird, all birds awaken a sense of wonder and enchantment by their ability to fly. They remind us that we all can rise above our circumstances. They are the ultimate symbols of transcendence.” ~ Ted Andrews, Animal Speak: The Spiritual & Magical Powers of Creatures Great and Small … Continue reading When dreams take flight
Michael Phelps aroused global curiosity about cupping during Rio 2016 (and made circular hickies cool), and Jennifer Anniston and Lady Gaga apparently embrace it too. That makes them all bloody crazy because cupping, a form of a Traditional Chinese Medicine that involves using glass suction cups to create a vacuum that sucks your soul out through … Continue reading Suck it up?
"Oh I might have to wait I'll never give up I guess it's half timing and the other half's luck Wherever you are Whenever it's right You'll come out of nowhere and into my life" - Micheal Bublé, Haven't Met You Yet I have a little ritual. Ahead of each cycle, I put together a … Continue reading Soundtrack for a cycle
So Monday brought with it the worst possible flu - which I assure you is among the shittiest things that can possibly happen four days before you are due to start stimming (especially given this rendition of the Battle of Stalingrad going on in my head). Cue: panic from all quarters on the fate of … Continue reading Slow down. Bump Ahead…